Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Downward Spiral (152)

Today started out really good. I got up, made my oatmeal, I even ate a good dinner, but when my sister came home at 9 pm with a plate of cake (I knew I should not eat), I put the cake in my mouth, chewed, and swallowed (the whole plate of cake). I don't know whats wrong with me. I ate it knowing full well I shouldn't, but I still did. It's like I am compelling myself to fail. So sad! I don't know why, but I defeat myself all time. :(

3 comments:

Liz said...

hey siana,
it's emotional eating. and it's ok. a three yr. old child just passed away and while you were a rock during the funeral, it's now your turn to grieve. so i do think eating is tied to the loss of a little boy and the sadness of your family. i could be wrong though. either way, forgive yourself. you of all people deserve compassion and forgiveness.

Leslie said...

I agree with Liz and don't be so hard on yourself. We all do things to ourselves that we don't agree with but do anyway. Remember we all not perfect but we can strive to do better the next day and that all you can do is to strive. I love you and you don't deserve to beat up on yourself because you're an amazing woman.

Dee said...

Hey! It's okay, move on to the next hour, meal, or day.

Moderation.........you can do it!